Random thoughts from people 25-45 years old

I had to post this, it is actually an email forward, but it was one of those things and you can't help but think how true most of it is. My comments are in parenthesis.

-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.
-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong. (Haven't we all been there?)
-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk. (My trick is to check my cell phone)
-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. (I always tell the children I know to cherish their naps)
-Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know" feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with?
-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft. (SOOOOO true.)
-There is a great need for sarcasm font.
-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.
-How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? (I hate trying to fold those things, there is seriously no good way)
-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
-Ithink part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die. (Ok, serioulsy, this one is stupid.)
-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text. (And then the red night never lasts long enough)
-A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it. (Yeah, I wouldn't know)
-I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
-Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".
-How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said? (I do that all the time, but it can come back to bite you in the butt)
-I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
-Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second> lapse)..ummm...Goonies" (I've done that only, I was giving my email address and I said T as in Tom. Then I said, or as in Tisha)
-MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
-Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
-I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.
-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
-Bad decisions make good stories.
-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!
-Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year? (It's awful how slutty they look when they also look way too young to be dressing like that)
-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....
-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection. (AMEN!)
-"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.
-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'
-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away? (I love this one, makes me laugh so hard, because it happens every time!)
-I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste. ( And then when you feel like crap, you see a ton of people you haven't seen in years)
-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...
-As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always>hate cyclists. (YUP, even though it may become a new past time of ours)
-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.
-Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey, but I'd bet everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...(I am sorry if anyone takes offense to this one, I wanted to edit, but thought I would ruin it)
-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?
-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com <http://cnn.com/ and the link takes me to a video instead of text.
-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit. (My brother in law is a cop and he said it gets annoying, especially when he is off duty)
-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
-I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay. (I don't drink, so in my world they don't being with Miller Lite either, but seriously who doesn't hate those commercials?)